Orange is the new black but it isn't very slimming!

Normally I can understand the information in our twice a week newspaper in Grand Rapids.

Like the headline "India based Essar Global acquires Minnesota Steel". This is a big deal for the Iron Range - it's a 1.6 billion dollar project. In a rural community where good paying jobs are scarce, this is huge.

Or take the headline "Blue Jackets Down T'Hawks". Though I don't understand "the sports" all that well - I can see from the photo that it probably has something to do with the swim meet between Hibbing and Grand Rapids.

In the most recent edition there was a page I did not understand at all. I read things like:

Game Cleaning Glove
Big Buddy 2 Man Stand
"Estrus" Bleat Easy Call
Ultimate Scrape Dripper
Allen Gambrell & Hoist System
Lansky Diamond Benchstone
Tikka T3 Bolt Rifles

Sometimes I think I'm missing out on the culture of Northern Minnesota. Maybe I need to get involved with "the deer hunting" with my husband so we can spend more time together. After all, he is a bow hunter which doesn't seem nearly as violent, and I like walking in the woods and special clothes and makeup as much as the next guy.

Just now he called from work with a proposition.

"I'll be home about 2. If you want to take a walk with me in the woods you could..."

How sweet! What a softy! He wants to hold hands and talk about our feelings.

But he wasn't done yet.

"I figure we could look for a blood trail. We'll check the beds for traces of blood."